I forgot I had this or Are blogs still a thing?

 It's been years since I've written anything in here, so I thought I'd drop in and do so for old time's sake.  What have I been doing? Well... publishing books, raising kids, working, training in BJJ, trying to avoid facing the reality that with every year I get closer and closer to the grim spectre of oblivion.  You know, the usual stuff!

Some days I lament the choices I made (or didn't make) from my past, others I'm just meh over them.  Some nights I can't sleep (or wake up in a panic) as I ponder the end of life and potential end of all that is, was, or ever could be, while others I fall asleep and wake up fine.  Some days I feel great, others like a breaking down fool.  I guess what I'm saying is middle age sucks and I know it's only going to get worse. God that's depressing. But I have lots of positives too. People have it way worse out there. I'm middle class, own a home, have some cool friends and neat stuff, have no serious health issues (that I know of) and manage to stay sane in a world that seems to be getting more insane with each year.  So I guess I can't complain right?

I won't.

I know this ride is always changing and there's lots more to see and do. I'll face what comes the same way I've faced what's already come. Keep on keeping on.  What else can I do?

I'll pop in again, don't worry!