Updates or Get a Load of This

So I got a reply to my message and it went something like this:

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well, well

first of all, what i said to you was "confidential" and was not to leave the confines of our conversation. how idiotic are you, really? it takes the most simple of friends to know that was is said, if it has any negative implication or connatation, is not to be spread like wildfire to anyone and everyone who it may hurt or slight. are you really that much of an asshole to spread around shit that makes me look like a prick. and who the hell was supposed to benefit from the tidal wave of undiclosed indecision. you? how bout, if they ask if i was coming, you say "ryan doesn't know if it will be a good social" and leave it at that. not that difficult is it? jesus. i dunno what goes through your mind sometimes. and i thought you were a better friend than that. seriously.

ps your apology is insincere and vague

RM

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Once again Ryan prooves unable to get the gist of something that isn't delivered as an action line by Bruce Willis. I guess I'll have to try to make it simpler for him.

This is what I sent to him:

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when replying to an email, please read the whole thing.

Now please answer the following questions for me so I know where you are coming from here.

1. Who told you what I said?
2. What did they say I said?
3. What did they say to you in regards to this situation?
4. What impact has this had on you?

While wating for said information I will re-iterate what I know and where I stand.

Of the people I told, no one was pissed off at you other than Jay and Tyler. Tyler's brief anger left when you showed up. Jay gets mad at a lot of things and will forget about the whole thing later anyway. Neither one of them had high expectations for the social and expressed that many times. They did not think your opinion was all that far off only that it was worded poorly.

Matt and Kostas both laughed their asses off at hearing what you said and (to me) expressed disbelief that you could be so clever. As far as I know, they gave you "mad props" for your thoughts.

From what was told to me, no one took the comments I relayed to them as something that was out of the ordinary for you. Perhaps it will be shocking to you to hear this but your reputation is that of someone who lacks tact. In case you aren't sure what that word means, I will give you a definition.

def: skill in dealing with people or situations; delicate perception of the feelings of others

Everyone that I know has come to accept this as part of who you are. Occasionally they get miffed at something inadvertantly said, but for the most part they all think of you as a friend. I seriously doubt (and what was told to me confirms it) that anyone took this comment as something strange or new or that it was meant vindictively towards the organizers. People perceive you (whether rightly or wrongly) as being someone who says stupid things without always meaning to. From what I hear, no one takes offense, they just laugh it off... as was done in this situation (at least from what I was told).

Again, I cannot give anymore information without knowing the answers to the questions I posed above.

In direct response to what you have written I say this (and I believe the subject was adequately broached in my previous email). Vindictive secrets are harmfull and destructive. It is better to know the feelings of everyone involved than to plod along preserving the status quo for no other reason than to avoid change. The free exchange of ideas can only bring about the positive. I hold no qualms with telling people what I feel because I think that it is better to work out issues aloud than to keep them bottled up. I mentioned that I felt that keeping things bottled up is one of the main problems in the Matt, Kostas, etc. group and I stand by that. There is nothing good about hiding your feelings from a real friend, they should be able to understand where you come from. As is the case in this situation (at least from what I was told). But again, I can only talk from my point of view here, you need to fill me in more with answers to my questions.

Ian

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I don't know if it's any simpler... The saga will continue soon... I hope...